@kovenant84: i'm so not fit for giving advice on the subject that you should probably take what follows as a spot-on guideline to do the exact opposite. but anyway.
let's start from your current literary kink and let's get it on with bradbury, who i'm pretty sure is also still alive.
he wrote a short story once, called "the fog horn". it deals - in the author's usual imaginative way - with the issue of the inevitable unbalance in every relationship. it says at some point that in every love story there is one who loves the other more than he (or she) is loved back, and this one person will be waiting for a long time after there is no hope for the partner to come back.
now, funnily enough, there is no mention of the waiting one being a dork.
all the nasty hurting details about what you should do and who you should be are - perhaps involuntary - thorns in your side courtesy of someone who happens to have a very strong power over you, whether she realises that or not. if i told you i would see you well as the new tolkien and added that i think you're wasting your time with engineering, you wouldn't take my judgement as a measurement of acceptance or rejection. and not only because currently we do not have a homosexual relationship going on, but just a temporary threesome with bradbury. you're bound to take what she says in a very bi-polar way even when she doesn't mean it like that: it's either love or hate, especially in an environment where it's obvious the competition is high and every little ounce of acceptance is a step on the stairway to heaven.
this is, however, not a defining moment for your qualities. you surely have your share, and they're not to be modelled over the (legitimate, up to a point) needs of this girl. if your offer is not good enough for her, then let go right now: it's unlikely that time would change the situation.
the way you put it - assuming of course it's an unbiased opinion - her claims are, with due respect, a tad childish. things like being around someone who makes you get wild or lose yourself and eliminate some tension, are definitely
not future benchmarks for a couple's happiness. i mean, it's good an right that she wants that, but i see no fucking reason why you shouldn't be able to provide these things. you talk to each other, you explain what you want to each other, and you behave accordingly, reaching a compromise that makes both happy and satisfied. it's not really that difficult when it comes to help someone release some anxiety or party on all night. you're a bright guy, why shouldn't you be able to go out with her and tear down the walls one night a week or something? it's not as if she's asking you to swim through a pool of razorblades and smile all the while.
so i guess in the end her words are just a symptom of lack of feelings, for reasons that - unfortunately - are more often than not bound to be clad in mystery. possibly to herself as well. if you suddenly shapeshifted into the life of the party she would probably be unsatisfied anyway, as these things are indeed rather shallow and fleeting, and nobody can want a party freak
or a geek 24/7. people will eventually look for brains, or looks, or fame, or money, or caring. like, broad categories. not "i don't like you because you sneeze too loud". this is either a conscious disguise or a misunderstanding of her own needs and desires.
in the end it does boil down to a gap in feelings, if not always like our good pal bradbury cynically assumed, at least for now. you love her and so you're at a disadvantage when it comes to take criticism or show who you really are. that's why she thinks she sees it better from a distance: the power of your feelings when you're close sounds doubtful and misguiding to her, because after all who are you in this school of 800 people and this world of 6 billions?
so go to sleep - if you haven't already - and try to think as little as possible. it won't get much better, but you will notice less how bad it is. you've made your offer, she's seen your cards. now it's not up to you anymore.
