Not-so-good-and-old "How do you feel" thread

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"How can I see through the broken glass of my dream?
Nothing left but the certitude of a fear
I dress in black visions tonight
As for once I know you won’t shine anymore
How can I see through the broken soul of my demons?
Memories carved in time can’t heal our reclusion
And I still hold on my darkest eyes to hide
The fractured senses of my aspiration.
Hate me, break me, scream for me, but just feel me
There is nothing I can do to cut the spell now
How can I see through you? "

I'm in a melancholic mood right now, always makes me write things like that :erk:
 
Im feeling melancolic, too. I wish I wasnt such an emotional person :erk: I want the days back when one mood fitted all... pfffft.
 
It's wierd, this infectious feeling of melancholia. I had it a while ago, and usually it goes away when something changes, but nothings changed and somehow I dont care about the miserable things. I know they're miserable, but I dont feel the misery. I can't help but think I'm being a bit of a whiney bastard.
 
@DragonLady: There's a poetry thread somewhere. I think what you wrote would fit there. :)
It's been a very long time since i last wrote something, but that can be both good and bad...

@Taliesin: this community is certainly not as close-knit as it used to be. i, for one, don't feel like even mentioning the important things that go on in my life anymore.
 
TheFourthHorseman said:
Me too. :cry: :cry: :(

For fuck's sake, it's no wonder no one posts fucking nothing on this board. At least be more elaborate if you feel such utter depression, it's a bit hard to say anything other than "There, there, it's not so bad" otherwise.
Who do you miss? Why do you miss them? Why do you feel like telling us about it? What are you going to do about it?
Click to expand...
Fine. I miss my super-dear cousin who's in the army, so i never see him anymore. He's got very little free time, because he's in some weird group there and always has duties, and all the free time he's got he naturally spends with his girlfriend. Every time i see him he hugs me for ages and says that he misses me and stuff, and it just makes me miss him even more.

I miss hanging out with my sister and her husband like we used to. We just don't have time for that anymore. I'm with my sis now though.

I miss a friend whom i'm not allowed to be friends with anymore.

I miss my pets like hell, because i never see them anymore. They're my very best friends who always make me feel better when i'm down.

I miss my best human-friends, because i never see them anymore, since i live in a different city nowadays.

I didn't feel like telling you about it, i just posted here because i was bored and had nothing better to do. I'm not going to do anything about it, because there's nothing i can do.

Better? :p

NF: Writing that made me sad again.
 
@Idari: Quite many people you're missing right now... I had many good and close friends, but somehow I got off school, and many of them developed in many ways, and so we weren't able to talk like before any more. I net my once-best-friend last friday. He's not what he used to be 4 years ago. To be honest, I was - somehow - happy when I was on my way back home again.

@KingChaos: "I can't help but think I'm being a bit of a whiney bastard."
--> It's possible that this is not a bad aspect. I think it's important - even as a male person - to be able to show your feelings. When looking in my face, you know exactly how I feel. No cheating, no lies.

NF: Talked to a friend yesterday, she experienced something similar like I did with Andrea. Very good conversation, I feel clearer now within my head.
 
Child of Time said:
I'll move to a new room May 1th. As big as this one and with almost as high rent, but much closer to the uni. I'll have to share kitchen with seven other students though. :eek: (I have a cooking recess now). It will be closer to my buddies to. That's not only positive, but mostly. :p
Click to expand...

I did share the kitchen with seven other students when I was working toward my Master's - nothing dramatic, but I was very lucky because there was only one person who didn't fit in well with the rest (she was a bit mad).

nf: i'm in a bit of a tight spot. actually, two tight spots. on the one hand, I had to bring work home because I have a 5pm deadline tomorrow that would be impossible to meet without devoting the next few hours to the job, which is very boring, by the way.
on the other hand - and i know this will command almost no sympathy because it's evil and all, but i'm still kinda bummed - i was outed today as the lover of the boyfriend of a friend of mine (and it's not even precisely true, but i have no chance of making myself heard), and i'm going to get so much shit for it that i seriously thought of leaving for a long holiday, but i can't. normally when engaged people have affairs they push for discretion, while their single counterpart is always on the brink of throw public tantrums so as to encourage a breakup. i have to be the only one who is caught in the reverse situation. idiots, all of them and me included. :Smug:
 
@hyena
how old were you when you finished your masters? and did you have a job while you completed it? kinda curious because I'm starting to arrange my stuff for after graduation, but I don't know if it would be better to start with a masters immediately or to get a job or whether it would be too overwhelming to do both at the same time.
 
Schwedentod said:
@Idari: Quite many people you're missing right now... I had many good and close friends, but somehow I got off school, and many of them developed in many ways, and so we weren't able to talk like before any more. I net my once-best-friend last friday. He's not what he used to be 4 years ago. To be honest, I was - somehow - happy when I was on my way back home again.
Click to expand...
I can still talk to my friends like before, but i see them way too rarely. This sucks about being in a relationship :/

NF: I've been at my parents' house for a couple of days now, which means that i've been with my pets. Now i'm about to leave and i miss them already. I started crying when i was packing my stuff and my cat was sitting next to me on the bed, and she looked sad because she knew that i'm leaving again :( I want to take her with me. STUPID DOGS DIE DIE DIE SO I CAN TAKE MY BABY WITH ME :'(
 
NF: Overambitious... why on why am i working on 7 albums at once? :| I'm an idiot, haha.

carry on..
 
NF: Bummed. Got the new PC home, connected the cables, started it up, got a splash screen, then a bunch of weirdness. It looked like several screens (~ 5 or 6) on top of each other...hard to read, etc. :\ Fortunately I still have the old one, so that's what I'm on now, although I did hook up the new keyboard. I love new keyboards. :D
 
@hitori: when i finished i was 23, i had no job but i had a doctoral scholarship (about 800 euros/month) that was supposed to last until 2004. i got a job in dec 2002 so i had to ditch the scholarship. i think that doing a master's while working might prove very hard; i managed to finish my phd while working but that's different, i already had the exams out of the way and i just needed to complete my dissertation. even then, i had to ask for a deferment and needed 4 yrs instead of 3. my advice to you is: do your master's and then look for a job, you'll find stuff that pays much more.
 
ugh the problem is, im 23 now, i'd probably finish until im 25. god im old.
anyway thanks.

NF: jaded
 
NF: Upset - fucked up at least one thing on a reeeeeeealy fucking easy test, and this guy gives shit for partial credit. Meh, hopefully the rest of my day will be better - I'd hate to have this be how 21 starts.

~kov.
 
@hitori: not a problem, 25 is not old. most people i met in grad school were around 25.
 
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