Not-so-good-and-old "How do you feel" thread

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@santtu: my understanding is clouded by the utmost confusion. is juha your boyfriend? your ex? you make it sound like things are happening that are beyond your control - is he going to study abroad? to work very far from you? to prison? what lies behind you and the triumph of the will? (too much manowar for me, sorry).

nf: curious about what tomorrow will bring. will possibly go out with v. nice guy for a reading of the aeneas. will most certainly have to work a bit too much during the day. reminder for me: no-excesses-of-alcohol-on-a-monday-night. duh.
 
NF: kinda good actually :)

I saw that bastard friend of mine who almost drove me insane last night. We talked for few hours and now we´re fine. Biggest problem is just that he and I and the most of my friends seem to suffer from unearthly boredom - If you´re bored it´s easier to pick up fights from silly things..
Anyway:
After talking with my friends I realized that we are somehow living an american tv-serie with all its´ clichés: "we gotta start seeing other people", which is quite funny considering that we´re group of (as far as i know) heterosexual young men, so we´re not too close to a cheerleader and a footballplayer. :loco:

My computer is making weird sounds, i just hope he wont die on me.
 
NF: Muchly nervous of imminent trip.... what on earth am i doing? haha... :erk: err... hopefully some people will enjoy my company (or at least cope with my company :p). I should think about actually preparing for it at some stage i guess. I'm not too sure i can survive alone too well. *scared*

Also feeling i should apologise to someone in my past, heh, i make lots of mistakes.. hmm.. im not sure i make a good 'good friend'.. *shrugs*

Not sure how to feel about anything else.. i appreciate getting some explanations finally, though they dont justify everything i at least have some idea of the thoughts behind recent events.. doesnt really make it any easier i guess. Just need to accept this is how life goes.. can't cling to what's already lost.

So now i have to find the next 'step' in life, the next personal goal i aim towards and the next way that i need to fix myself up a bit more... i think i need to get a band together
 
hyena said:
(too much manowar for me, sorry).
Don't apologise! Too much manowar is a good thing! :p

NF: Pretty good. all my lessons are cancelled so Im taking a "full on relaxing day". I might do some exercise but other than that Ill be spamming forums with my usual crap.

I felt really bad when I woke up this morning. I saw this bastard guy that my girlfriend cheated on me with over a year ago (just a kiss, but that still hurt me so bad). Anyway this guy is a retarded roughian so whenever I see him I always feel really bad, like Im going to have to fight with him. Chances are I'd lose though because all he ever does is fight with people. I cant believe my girlfriend let him kiss her :yell: (<that sentence sums up why I feel bad about it sometimes).

(Here comes some interesting yet fairly irelevant history)

I didn't fight with him the other day, but I did once in the past and it wasnt pretty. What pisses me off is that he came on to my woman and I did what most out numbered corner boys would do and just cried about it (not threatening to take actions against his actions).
~~~~Then 4 months later he approaches me in the street with a gang and in front of my girlfriend starts attacking me. He leaves without me fighting back (because I thought his gang was going to get involved). I sit down because Im beaten up and hurt. 5 mins later he returns with a bigger gang saying "he wants some more". My girlfriend started trying to fight him for me (which I didn't approve of one bit) and she got thrown really hard straight away so I snapped and laid the hurt down on him. I got in loads of punch's apparently but after my little fluster I noticed my girlfriend was having a mega violent panic attack. All my adrenaline left and then my enemy came over and just totally took me out. They all left us literally dying.

Lovely story for a monday morning.

[random recolition] Funilly enough earlier in that same week a random gang of townie Cunts got on the same bus as me and seemingly took quite a liking to my girlfriend. After I stuck up for her by telling the morons to have some respect and leave us alone one of them decided to make putty out of me. He hit me (with rings on) three times in the face with me having no block what so ever. This event took place three days before the other event detailed above. I think this is why I'm paranoid about getting on busses and walking the streets in general. :cry:
[/random recolition]
 
NF: Two early mornings and a lot of driving yesterday and today, with my mum in the passenger seat (which is not fun.. she constantly tells me to watch my speed, slow down, be careful, and at one point she slammed her right foot down on the floor as if to brake), have made me feel absolutely knackered. So to come home after that and find my uni results waiting for me was not a good thing. Now my parents know just how catastrophically I failed maybe they'll take my giving up a little better. What happens now, or more accurately after Tuska, is still anyone's guess, and I'm really not looking forward to that. Fuck knows what I'll end up doing, and where I'll end up doing it.
 
Hahaha. Great sig yet again, Rusty. Hope you sort out your stuff, but just concentrate on having a good time at Tuska now. :)

NF: Really tired again, and I suppose it was time for my feel-good streak to break by now. Not down either though, just tired as ever. I'm not sure if listening to Devin really helps on the matter, but whatever.
 
today was an average day, with a couple of highs and lows. not much to harp on about, so i won't. i do have to wake at 6am tomorrow for a photo shoot :zombie:

nf: disappointed
 
NF: tired but still EXCITED!! German visitors are coming over toDAY, jaiks! :tickled: and this means that today is my last day at work this week, heehee. Hey, I have a good excuse, don´t I? ;) Tomorrow better not be raining :bah: since we´re going to amusement park. *silent partying*
 
nf: temperature drop -> pffff. i love the liquid sense of heat one gets when it's 35° C or more. summer exists for that feeling exactly, being enveloped by heat. but no, we're having mild, sweet springtime with no passion at all.
 
NF: boooored.. guh. 4 more hours to go at work and basically nothing to do.
Yesterday evening/ last night was okay, I got a present from my man and we had a dinner in a restaurant.
 
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